I honestly don’t have a good answer to that question. However, I also don’t know how to make myself stop thinking about the past and how things have changed; why they’ve changed.
Today would have been my two year wedding anniversary. I am more than ready for this year to be over.
In the past two weeks, things have gone from good to bad to worse to better and back again. I feel like I need a good New Year’s resolution… Or just a stiff drink. Any takers?
tell you the story of who I am.
It has been a hell of a month. Or two. Or however long it’s been since I blogged last. There has just been so much going on. I don’t know where to start. I know, I know… If I actually did this regularly, I wouldn’t have this problem, right?
So, there is currently a nasty, spoiled milk type smell lingering around my kitchen. I have spent FIVE DAYS searching for where this smell is coming from. I’ve cleaned and vacuumed and washed gotten down on my hands and knees to sniff the carpet… all to no avail. Finally, tonight I started cleaning my refrigerator (even though you can tell when you open it that the smell isn’t coming from inside)… and found that the smell is coming from underneath. I guess when I was sniffing my carpet it was when the refrigerator wasn’t running, because it was tonight, and it was blowing a disgusting scent out of the vent at the bottom. Now, I removed the vent and all I can see is dust on the carpet. But, I don’t have a flashlight, and I’m honestly scared to know what’s under there anyway. I (obviously) can’t move the fridge all by myself, so I’m going to call the landlord tomorrow and see if she can do something about it. However, she is known for taking forever and a day to call people back, so it might be next month before I actually get rid of this god-awful smell. Hopefully I can last that long..
School and work have been insane recently. I’m full-time [at both] now, so I’m basically never home. I’ve been taking Gage to school in the mornings for Rach, and we ride to school together on Mondays and Wednesdays, so that’s been making my days even longer. I haven’t been getting much sleep. Getting off work at half past midnight five nights a week and having to be awake by 0700… It takes a toll. I can’t wait for this semester to be over. Then, I’ll [hopefully] be starting at IUK and [hopefully] my schedule won’t be so hectic and nonstop. However, I haven’t registered for classes yet, so we’ll see how that actually works out.
In other news, I’m going down to Tennessee for Thanksgiving! I’m staying with Ash and Luke, and I’m super excited about it. For a lot of reasons, really. One of them being that I just need to get away from this place. School, work, people… I’m ready to forget about all of it for a few days. I’m burnt out to the point where I almost can’t find a good reason to keep going through the motions anymore. I need a break. Also, Luke’s going to do a tattoo for me while I’m there… I’m pretty stoked. I’m getting cherry blossoms across the top of my foot.
Annnd I have a date. Whaaaaat? No, really. I do. He’s a soldier (don’t start with me), and he seems to be a really great guy so far. He’s intelligent, and he has goals for when he gets out of the army. We’ve been talking for a week or so now on the phone and online, and I’m really starting to like him. It was a little awkward at first, though… Luke was trying to set us up the last time I was in TN, and I’m just awkwardly shy in situations like that. Especially when there’s the pressure of… well, Luke. Lol. But it seems to be going well so far. As long as I don’t say something stupid and screw it up, it’ll be all good.
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