Archive for the ‘lyrics’ Category

Always under attack, always coming in last, bringing up the past; no one owes you anything.

Things have been interesting since I blogged last. I’m proud of the way things are going, actually. It’s amazing for me to sit back and think about how much I’ve changed in the past few months. I’m not the same person I used to be. But, I’m stronger than I ever was. And no matter how unhappy I am right now, I always have that to fall back on.

I worked Friday and Saturday nights, so I figured my weekend would be uneventful, but I was pleasantly surprised. Nick called as Greta and I were closing the store Saturday to tell me that he was having a party and that I should stop by. I usually use the buddy system when I’m going somewhere [especially to a party] where I basically won’t know anyone [because I'm shy & quiet around people I don't know], but I figured I should man-up. Haha. I’m glad I went, because I ended up having a great time. I was a little quiet a first, but after a couple rounds of beer pong I was pretty social. I even made a few new friends. We had a dance contest [a lot of them actually] that ended up without a judge because everyone joined in, and we all ended up dancing around like idiots to the Dirty Dancing soundtrack. Yeah, we’re cool like that.

Sunday was pretty lazy considering I didn’t even get to bed until six-thirty in the morning. I spent most of the day lounging around out at Mom and Dad’s house. I got up this morning and went to my philosophy class, but I ended up skipping my second class. I’ve been trying to get a hold of Weeze’s property manager since Friday, and she’s supposed to call me before the office closes today. That’s in an hour, so we’ll see. I’m not the most patient person in the world. I really need to work on that.

I have a ton of homework that I should be doing, but I’m really not motivated. I even have a rough draft of and english paper that I haven’t started due Thursday morning. Oops. If worse comes to worse, I can always write it after work on Wednesday. =/

I finally managed to get some money out of the ex. He tried hinting, after the measly $200 that he gave me [he still owes me another $1000], that I wouldn’t be getting anymore, but we’ll see about that. I’m 90% sure that he’s still getting BAH for being married anyway, and I just got a notice of cancellation in the mail from USAA, so it’s not like he’s made a car insurance payment since May. He should have some money to spare. Oh, wait… That’s right. He blows it as soon as it hits the bank. Some things never change.

Oh my, here we go. Another loose canon gone bi-polar slipped down, couldn’t get much lower. Quicksand’s got no sense of humor; I’m still laughing like hell.

How about various song lyric excerpts to relay how I’m feeling lately? Ok, great.

How long have I been in this storm,
so overwhelmed by the ocean’s shapeless form?
Water’s getting harder to tread,
with these waves crashing over my head.
I know you didn’t bring me out here to drown,
so why am I ten feet under and upside down?
Barely surviving has become my purpose,
’cause I’m so used to living underneath the surface.
-”Storm” by Lifehouse

A note by the door simply explains it’s all that remains.
It’s no wonder why I have not slept in days.
By the way, you left without saying goodbye to me.
Now that you’re gone away,
all I can think about is you and me.
It’s not like before.
You left nothing here, it’s all disappeared.
It hurts me to see that we’ve been a lie.
Would it have hurt you to try?
-”By the Way” by Theory of a Deadman

Under 50 thousand miles ago,
before the bad blood and busted radio,
you said I was all you’d ever need.
But, love is blind and little did I know
that you were just another dead end road,
paved with pretty lies and broken dreams.
Baby, leavin’ you is easier than being gone;
I don’t know what I’ll do if one more thing goes wrong.
I’d sure hate to break down here,
nothin’ up ahead or in the rearview mirror.
Out in the middle of nowhere knowin’
I’m in trouble if these wheels stop rollin’.
So, God help me, keep me movin’ somehow,
don’t let me start wishin’ I was with him now.
I made it this far without cryin’ a single tear,
and I’d sure hate to break down here.
-”Breakdown Here” – Julie Roberts

I’m falling apart again.
I can’t find a way to make amends.
I’m looking in both directions,
but, it’s make-believe; it’s all pretend.
It’s innocence within the maze,
but, I have chosen the wrong way.
I’m still getting over who I was.
There’s no sense of trust;
no definition of love.
-”Shed Some Light” by Shinedown

Don’t ever lose your morals,
since I could never fill that hole.
And I never burnt your letters,
but I think I like you better when you get what deserve.
-”What You Deserve” by Theory of a Deadman

I turn my head to the East,
I don’t see nobody by my side.
I turn my head to the West,
still nobody in sight.
So, I turn my head to the North,
swallow that pill that they call pride.
That old me’s dead and gone,
but the new me will be alright.
-”Dead and Gone” by TI feat. Justin Timberlake